This week, to attain, maintain or regain my sense of wellbeing...
...I will practice paying attention to the things I can do and the things I like to engage with to help build my sense of self-efficacy (sense of being able to handle things) and awareness of enjoyable experiences. This will help build my resilience to stress and distress and will also give me good data about myself that I can use to self-soothe when I am stressed and create positive emotion when I am low.
To prepare, I will take a page in a notebook and divide it into two columns. The first column, I will title 'One Thing I Can Do' and the second column I will title 'One Thing I Like' (see example below).
To practice, I will take a moment at the end of each day to write down an example of 'One Thing I Can Do' and 'One Thing I Like' from my day. In the 'One Thing I Can Do' column, I will write down one thing that I did that day that I think I did well and what skill, attribute or quality it involved. In the 'One Thing I Like' column, I will write down one thing from my day that I enjoyed or appreciated and what it was that I liked about it. If I've been having tough times for a while, it might be hard to do this because I will be out of practice at noticing these things and I might have stopped doing a lot of the things I am good at and like. If I find it hard, I will have compassion for myself and practice noticing the smallest of small signs of 'Things I Can Do' or 'Things I Like' - for example, getting out of bed, showering and single moments of laughter.
As I move through the week, I will think through my growing list and know that there are things I can do to get through and things I like that can change my mood. As my awareness grows I will start trying to mindfully do those things when I notice my mood is low or my thinking is negative. This week, I will practice building the evidence that lets me remind myself "there is always one thing I can do and one thing that I can enjoy."
My notebook columns would look something like this...
| Things I can do… | Things I like… |
| Monday: I handled a tricky phone call – diplomatic Tuesday: I cooked a good dinner – cooking Wednesday: I supported a friend – supportive Thursday: I sent work emails – organised Friday: I solved a problem at work – dedicated Saturday: I socialised – interactive Sunday: I did the laundry – conscientious | Monday: Watching the sunset Tuesday: Sushi for lunch Wednesday: Walking in the park in the breeze Thursday: Watching the waves at the beach Friday: Watched a movie Saturday: Hanging out with friends Sunday: Fresh sheets on the bed |
Once I am comfortable noticing what I can do and what I like, and mindfully doing those things, I will add this to my Personal Coping Kete as a way of coping with distress. When I find myself feeling stuck, hopeless or unsure of myself, I will be able to self-soothe by coming back to my old list to remind myself I am capable and the things I can do to change my mood and engage with a way of shifting my experience by doing just one of the things I can do and one thing that I like. This strategy could become self-soothing, engagement or mindful distraction depending on how I used it.
