Category Archives: Mindful Distraction

No. 122: Use the Positivity Ratio

December 15, 2012 11:54 am ⋅ Leave a Comment ⋅ admin

This week, to attain, maintain or regain my sense of wellbeing…

…I am going to practice using the Positivity Ratio to help shift my thoughts and feelings. Researchers in the field of Positive Psychology have found that it takes three positive thoughts to shift a negative thought. This week, I am going to practice consciously having positive thoughts, so that when I find my thoughts going dark, I will be able to use my skills to improve the moment. As I go through each day, I will try to pause whenever I remember to and list three positive things I have recently noticed. I will work to list the smallest things I can, as well as noticing bigger things. This will help me get really used to noticing the elements of things that might bring me some joy. This week, I am going to learn how to notice the things that might give me joy. I will let them exist alongside anything that I find unpleasant or distressing. As I list my three positive things, I will focus my awareness on each thing and make myself really mindful of all of the good things about it and what it is that makes it positive to me. I will try to do this at least two or three times every day this week, regardless of how I feel. It might help to schedule in to do it in the morning and at night so I remember to practice – remembering to practice can be really hard. When I am familiar with purposefully thinking of three small positives, I will add ‘ Use the Positivity Ratio’ to my Personal Coping Kete. When I notice myself having pessimistic thoughts or feeling really bad, I will use the positivity ratio to make myself mindfully aware of three good things, however small they may be. I will let those three good things, exist side-by-side with whatever else I am experiencing so that the hard things do not stop me from noticing the good things.

Posted in: Mindful Distraction, Self-Soothing ⋅ Tagged: creative expression, physical activity, social connection, Stress Management

No. 118: Declare a Peace Treaty with the Moment

November 3, 2012 2:41 pm ⋅ Leave a Comment ⋅ admin

This week, to attain, maintain or regain my sense of wellbeing … Coping Kete

… I will practice mindful distraction and self-soothing by regularly pausing and declaring a peace treaty with the current moment. When I declare a peace treaty with a moment, that means I am committing to spend a moment in peace before moving on to my next experience of the day. I will surrender whatever is on my mind for a moment and peacefully engage my attention in my surroundings. This week, when I am in between tasks, I will practice saying to myself either silently or out loud “I declare a peace treaty with this moment.” I will then take a minute or more to ground myself peacefully in the current moment before I move on to the next task before me. Declaring a peace treaty with a moment means that for this moment I will interact with myself and my surroundings in a kind, calm way. I will take 10 slow, deep breaths while I stop and mindfully observe my current surroundings. As I notice thoughts about the past or the future surfacing, I will remind myself of my peace treaty with this moment and turn my attention back to my peaceful breathing and the space around me in this current moment. In accordance with my peace treaty, if I notice critical or judgemental thoughts, I will say something kind or accepting to myself to soothe them. I will then bring my attention back to my breathing and observing my current surroundings. In this way, I will practice giving myself times of relaxation and release from worrying or critical self-talk. By practicing breathing at the same time, I will be able to return to the next task of the day with a clearer mind and calmer mood. Each time I find myself in between tasks, I will stop and practice declaring a peace treaty with the moment again. Throughout the week I will experiment with different ways of doing it until I find what works well for me. I will keep a record of the things that make it tricky and how to respond to them differently next time, so I can start to build a good list of what a Peace Treaty with the Moment looks like and involves for me. Once I have become familiar with the practice of declaring a peace treaty with a moment and taking some time to be present and kind to myself in between ordinary, daily tasks, I will add it to my Personal Coping Kete for times when I find myself struggling against stress and distress. I will be able to declare a peace treaty with the difficult moment, disengage from feelings of conflict and take some time out to send myself some mindful messages of calm and compassion before I respond. _ _ _ _ Acknowledgement: This mindfulness strategy was inspired by Thich Naht Hanh’ s Peace Treaty method for communication during conflict. Thich Naht Hanh is known for creating the Engaged Buddhism movement and popularising mindfulness in the Western world.

Posted in: Mindful Distraction, Self-Soothing ⋅ Tagged: acceptance, breathing exercises, Coping, self-care, Self-Talk, Stress Management

No. 116: A Moment for Self-Care

October 19, 2012 4:13 pm ⋅ Leave a Comment ⋅ admin

This week, to attain, maintain or regain my sense of wellbeing… Coping Kete

… I will practice using small moments of self-care to create positive experiences in my day. Self-care is the act of caring for myself by meeting my basic needs for food and water, movement, fresh air, sunlight, stillness, and physical care. I will spend some time every morning and evening focused on a self-care activity from one of these categories. I will start out by making a list of activities I like for each kind of self-care first and then use my diary to plan which activities I will do each morning and night. I might even add to these categories if I want to, I could add ‘ Connection’ or ‘ Noise’ or any other kind of activity that I feel fits with my idea of what my ‘ basic needs’ are.

For example:

Food and water

Sit down and eat breakfast
Take time to prepare lunch
Make something really healthy for dinner
Eat a favourite food
Stop to drink a glass of water

Movement

Dance to music in my room
Go to a ‘No Lights No Lycra’ event
Do some yoga stretches
Take mini-breaks to stroll round the room

Fresh air

Pause and do some belly-breathing
Stand outside and breathe deep for a moment
Pop my head out an open window

Sunlight

Read a book in the sun
Do some gardening
Eat lunch outside

Stillness

Go to bed early to read a book
Light some candles and listen to chill-out music
Paint something on that blank canvas I have sitting around

Physical care

Make one of the spaces in my house nice to be in
Cleanse and moisturise my face
Wash and brush my hair
Wear something that feels good to be in

As I do each activity I will focus all my attention on the task at hand, being aware as I go that I am making a simple gesture of caring to myself. As I move through the week, I will be mindful of how I am affected by my moments of self-care so I can tell which activities work to shift my mood and whether I want to adjust them at all. Once I am comfortable purposefully doing self-care activities on a regular basis and have found some that boost my mood, I will add them to my Personal Coping Kete and use ‘ A Moment of Self-Care’ as a way of nurturing and valuing myself during times of stress and distress.

Posted in: Engagement, Mindful Distraction, Self-Soothing ⋅ Tagged: breathing exercises, coping skills, emotional regulation, mindfulness practice, physical needs, positive thinking, self-care, Stress Management, time-out

No. 111: Make Someone a Card

August 31, 2012 5:09 pm ⋅ Leave a Comment ⋅ admin

This week, to attain, maintain, or regain my sense of wellbeing…

…I will practice turning my attention to something positive by taking time in my week to make a card for someone I am grateful to for something and deliver or post it to them. I will schedule a time later in the week to make the card, so I have plenty of time to get organised. For the next little while, I will think over the people and things that I am grateful for until I think of a person I want to acknowledge and make a card for. It could be for something big, something small, something recent, or something from a long time ago. It doesn’ t really matter, but if this kind of thing makes me nervous, I could pick something small, like a recent favour from a friend. Once I have thought of someone, I will start getting ready to get creative. I will want to find some card or paper to make it out of and design my own image for the front – I could draw something or cut pictures out of magazines or print something off a computer – but I won’ t buy the card, this week’ s strategy is also about using my creativity. Finally, I will write a short thank-you message on the inside, letting them know I appreciate what they have added to my life. I might need to spend a little while drafting what I want to say on some scrap paper. No matter what is happening in my day this week, I will find time each day to think about or work on making my card to someone I am thankful for. It is much harder to do these things when we feel low, so I might do it in little bursts, bringing my attention mindfully back to the card and where I am up to with it, whenever I am able. This week, I am practicing the art of emphasising the good stuff. It’ s not a skill that comes naturally to all of us, and modern life isn’ t set up to help us remember to notice and highlight the things we are grateful for. Making a thank-you card means I will practice turning my attention towards positive memories as well as get a chance to practice letting myself be creative. By sending the card, I am learning another way of sending positive vibes out into the lives of others. These are all things I could feel good about. Once I have gotten comfortable being aware of the things I am grateful for and making a card for someone at any old time, I will add it to my Personal Coping Kete as a way of balancing my attention when life seems to be throwing all the hard stuff my way. When I notice I am finding things distressing on a regular basis, I will spend some time thinking of things I am grateful for, making a card to acknowledge one, and sending it to the person. Each time I notice myself getting pessimistic, I will bring my thoughts back to my card and the meaning behind it to help balance my thoughts and remember that it isn’ t all bad, all the time.

Posted in: Engagement, Expression & Support, Mindful Distraction ⋅ Tagged: creative expression, Giving and Contributing, mindfulness practice, relaxation techniques, social connection, Stress Management, visual art

No. 109: Create Something Simple to Have Faith in

August 11, 2012 6:59 pm ⋅ Leave a Comment ⋅ admin

This week, in order to attain, maintain or regain my sense of wellbeing…

… I will practice coping with uncertainty by creating a simple vision for the future that I can have faith in achieving and then reminding myself of it on a regular basis. First of all, I will think of the simple things I would like to see in my future. I will make sure I think of positive and realistic things, that I could have faith in achieving or maintaining if I put my mind to it. I could list things like being close to my family, a safe place to live, regular healthy meals or a daily routine I enjoy. Second, I will visualise or imagine what a day would look and feel like in that future. I will try my best to bring a realistic and detailed picture of it into my mind, from waking up in the morning to going to bed at night. Finally, I will write down all of the things I imagined I did and experienced as part of that day. As I move through my week, I will regularly bring my mind back to that simple vision of my future and remind myself that no matter where I am now, my vision of the future is where I will one day be. If I find this hard, I might set an alarm on my phone to remind me to spend a moment visualising it. Whenever I can, I will mindfully do what I imagined I would do in the course of a day in my vision of the future. In this way, I really can have faith that I will gradually get there and I will give myself small bits of evidence that helps me have hope every day. When I am familiar with creating a simple vision and visualising it throughout the day, I will add it to my Personal Coping Kete as a strategy for self-soothing and engagement in times of stress, distress or mental unwellness. When I am finding it hard to have hope, I will focus my attention on creating something I can have hope in. By spending time visualising a positive picture of my future and reminding myself of the small things I can do to achieve it, I can actively balance any worried thoughts I might be having about how things are going to turn out and leave room for the possibility that everything will turn out okay in the end.

Posted in: Engagement, Mindful Distraction, Self-Soothing ⋅ Tagged: distraction, gratitude, humor, perspective, positive thinking, social connection, Stress Management

No. 107: Think of the Safer Alternatives

July 28, 2012 11:29 am ⋅ Leave a Comment ⋅ admin

This week, to attain, maintain or regain my sense of wellbeing… Coping Kete

…I will practice harm minimisation as a way of responding to distress. As I move through my week, when I notice small changes in my mood or any self-destructive urges, I will practice thinking of the safest way of responding to the way I feel. Where I might sometimes have the urge to do something to hurt myself to express the way I feel, this week, I will practice thinking about the less harmful alternatives. When I notice my thinking or feelings heading in a self-destructive direction, I will ask myself “what would be the safest way of responding to this?” For example, if I notice myself thinking about cutting myself to relieve my distress, I will think about some less harmful things that might give me the same release. In this way, I will nurture my wellbeing and treat myself with a bit more respect and kindness. Using intense, but safe sensations is often really helpful. Some people find that holding a piece of ice or running a piece of sharp ice over their skin gives them an intense almost painful sensation that can replace the need to cut. Other people find snapping a rubber band on their wrist does the same thing. Yet other people find that running a red felt-tip pen over their arm gives them an intense visual picture that replaces the need to self-harm. Some people find them all helpful at different times. This week I will practice imagining doing these kinds of things rather than thinking about hurting myself. This week, I will practice thinking about doing these kinds of things whenever I notice myself thinking about hurting myself. Once I have gotten used to thinking about these safer alternative ways of reacting to my distress, I will add ‘ Think of a Safer Alternative’ and the strategies I thought of to my Personal Coping Kete as a way of responding when I feel the urge to hurt myself.

Posted in: Mindful Distraction, Self-Soothing ⋅ Tagged: Coping, self-care, Stress Management

No. 101: Stretching Distraction

June 16, 2012 10:55 am ⋅ Leave a Comment ⋅ admin

This week, to attain, maintain or regain my sense of wellbeing… Coping Kete

…I will practice stretching to distract myself from the present moment and lift my energy. Once a day I will spend a few minutes doing some basic yoga stretches. As I do them I will practice mindfully focusing my attention on the movements I am making and the way they feel in my body. I will practice letting thoughts of the day pass through my mind as I observe them and bring my mind back to my stretches.\r

Neck Roll: Standing up, relax your shoulders, drop your head forward to rest your chin on your chest. Slowly roll your head to rest your right ear on your right shoulder, pause, return to centre then slowly roll your head to rest your left ear on your left shoulder, pause, return to centre. Repeat.

Shoulder and Arm Rotation: Stretch your arms out to the side and imagine you are pushing apart two walls. Repeat three times. Keeping the arms at shoulder level, rotate the shoulders forwards and then backwards. Repeat three times. Slowly drop arms to the side and observe the sensation produced in your body.

Swaying Tree pose: Standing with your feet at hip-width, reach your arms above your head, clasp your hands together, exhale and lean gently to the left. Inhale and come back to centre. Then exhale and lean to the right. Repeat.

Cat Pose: Kneel on all fours with hands shoulder distance apart and your knees the same distance apart. Exhale while arching your back up and looking down at your belly. Hold for a few seconds. Inhale as you arch your back down and lift your head.

\r Once I am familiar with doing stretches as part of my ordinary day, I will add them to my Personal Coping Kete as a way of distracting myself from distressing moments and times of stress and tension. When I notice I am feeling tense, I can take myself away from present company for a moment and practice my stretches.

Posted in: Mindful Distraction ⋅ Tagged: breathing exercises, emotional regulation, mindfulness practice, physical needs, relaxation, self-care, Stress Management, time-out

No. 98: Just One Pleasurable Thing

May 25, 2012 11:26 am ⋅ admin

This week, to attain, maintain or regain my sense of wellbeing... 

...I will purposefully do one potentially pleasurable thing every day.

From the list of 113 activities below, I will choose one different potentially pleasurable thing that I can do each day and plan which day I will do them. I might not be certain about whether I'm actually going to like doing the activity - It just has to have the potential for some kind of enjoyment, interest, pleasure,or entertainment that I value. Each time I put one of the activities into practice, I will acknowledge my accomplishment, however small. I will observe how I felt before, during and after the activity to help myself become aware of what kinds of things lift my mood and shift my energy levels more than others.

It can be hard to start doing pleasurable things if we have been down or disconnected for a while. So I might plan small steps to begin with and scale back the length of time I plan on doing each activity for - e.g. it might be easier to start with attempting a 5-minute activity than an hour-long one. The goal for this week is to start by doing just trying one thing each day, regardless of how I feel. If the idea of every day is hard, I'll just do one or two days. It doesn't even need to work, the point is just to practice doing it and get used to doing it. If it's unfamiliar, it probably won't start being enjoyable until I'm used to doing it.

Once I am comfortable doing pleasurable things every day. I will add 'Just One Pleasurable Thing' to my Personal Coping Kete along with a short list of some of my favourite things. Then, in moments of stress and distress, I will try doing just one pleasurable thing to shift the way I am feeling in the moment. It's good to have a mini-list there because it can be ultra hard to think of pleasurable things to do when we are in a bad space.

113 Pleasurable Activities 

	Soaking in the bathtub
	Planning my career
	Collecting things (coins, shells, etc.)
	Recycling old items
	Going to a movie
	Jogging, walking
	Thinking I have done a full day’s work
	Lying in the sun
	Planning a career change
	Listening to others
	Reading magazines or newspapers
	Hobbies (stamp collecting, model building, etc.)
	Spending an evening with good friends
	Planning a day’s activities
	Meeting new people
	Remembering beautiful scenery
	Going to the gym, doing aerobics
	Thinking how it will be when I finish school
	Getting out of debt/paying debts
	Practising karate, judo, yoga
	Repairing things around the house
	Working on my car (bicycle)
	Remembering the words and deeds of loving people
	Having quiet evenings
	Taking care of my plants
	Going swimming
	Doodling
	Exercising
	Collecting old things
	Going to a party
	Playing golf
	Playing soccer
	Flying kites
	Having discussions with friends
	Having family get-togethers
	Going camping
	Singing around the house
	Arranging flowers
	Going to church, praying (practising religion)
	Going to the beach
	Thinking I’m an OK person
	A day with nothing to do
	Going ice skating, roller skating/blading
	Sketching, painting
	Doing embroidery, cross stitching
	Going birdwatching
	Singing with groups
	Playing musical instruments
	Doing arts and crafts
	Making a gift for someone
	Buying CDs, tapes, records
	Watching boxing, wrestling
	Planning parties
	Cooking, baking
	Going hiking, bush walking
	Writing books (poems, articles)
	Going out to dinner
	Discussing books
	Sightseeing
	Early morning coffee and newspaper
	Playing tennis
	Watching my children (play)
	Going to plays and concerts
	Catch up with an old friend
	Daydreaming
	Watching videos or DVDs
	Going bike riding
	Completing a task
	Thinking about my achievements
	Eating gooey, fattening foods
	Photography
	Star gazing
	Reading fiction
	Being alone
	Writing diary/journal entries or letters
	Cleaning
	Reading non-fiction
	Dancing
	Thinking “I did that pretty well” after doing something
	Meditating
	Having lunch with a friend
	Going to the hills
	Playing cards
	Having a political discussion
	Solving riddles/puzzles
	Seeing and/or showing photos or slides
	Knitting/crocheting/quilting
	Shooting pool/Playing billiards
	Dressing up and looking nice
	Reflecting on how I’ve improved
	Talking on the phone
	Going to museums, art galleries
	Lighting candles
	Having coffee at a cafe
	Getting/giving a massage
	Saying “I love you”
	Thinking about my good qualities
	Having a spa, or sauna
	Going skiing
	Going canoeing or white-water rafting
	Going bowling
	Doing woodworking
	Fantasising about the future
	Doing ballet, jazz/tap dancing
	Debating
	Having an aquarium
	Going horseback riding
	Going rock climbing
	Thinking about becoming active in the community
	Making jigsaw puzzles
	Playing with my pets
	Having a barbecue
	Rearranging the furniture in my house

These activities were taken from a longer list by an unknown author found in a great online article by Elisha Goldstein, which also happens to have some excellent tips on putting pleasurable activities into action when they feel like the last things we want to do.

Posted in: Engagement, Mindful Distraction ⋅ Tagged: Behavioural Activitation, physical needs, relaxation, Stress Management, Valued Actions

No. 96: Learning a Theme Song

May 11, 2012 1:19 pm ⋅ Leave a Comment ⋅ admin

This week, to attain, maintain or regain my sense of wellbeing… Coping Kete

…I will use music to help me improve the moment and connect with positive emotion by learning to hum or whistle a song I associate with happy vibes and good energy. If no song jumps to mind automatically I will get to spend some time listening to different songs until I find one I like. Then as I move through my day, I will periodically remember to practice humming or whistling the tune while I am doing my daily tasks. This could help to insert some pleasant energy into whatever I am doing. Once I am comfortable and familiar with humming or whistling my tune, I will add it to my Personal Coping Kete as a distraction and self-soothing technique for times of stress and distress. Then, when I find myself stressed or distressed, I can distract myself for a moment by trying to remember the tune and whistling/humming it. The act of humming and whistling changes the level of oxygen in the blood and can physically help to soothe negative emotions I could be feeling, so I can return to the situation later with a clearer head. Whenever I hum or whistle my tune, I will be reminded of the positive message of the song I chose and this might also help inspire me through tough moments. This is also a pretty good strategy to use if I ever feel so anxious that it gets hard to breathe. Humming or whistling a song could help to counteract that without having to focus my attention onto my breathing.

Posted in: Mindful Distraction, Self-Soothing ⋅ Tagged: acceptance, breathing exercises, Music Strategies, physical needs, relaxation, time-out

« Previous 1 2 3 4 5 Next »

Category Archives: Mindful Distraction

No. 118: Declare a Peace Treaty with the Moment

No. 116: A Moment for Self-Care

No. 107: Think of the Safer Alternatives

No. 101: Stretching Distraction

No. 98: Just One Pleasurable Thing

No. 96: Learning a Theme Song

Post Navigation

A Note to Visitors