The Coping Kete

No 71: Requesting Assistance

This week, to attain, maintain or regain my sense of wellbeing…

…I will give myself the support I need to get through  difficult things by practicing the art of seeking help.

When I find myself feeling stressed or pressed, I will approach someone either in person, over the phone or in an instant message to let them know what is happening and ask for their help – either support, advice or practical assistance. If they are unavailable, I will go to someone else.

This week, when I feel something distressing, I will name the feeling and request assistance with it. 

So this week, I will practice saying things like “I am feeling stressed out right now, can you help me through it?” and “I’m feeling upset about something, can you talk to me about it?” and “I’m feeling worried right now, can you help distract me?”

In this way, I will get skilled at seeking support when I need it and allowing others to help me through. Notice that these small expressions don’t require the other person to actually solve the problem for you, but to stand beside you through the experience. People are often overwhelmed when they are asked to solve a problem, but they can find it much easier to stand with someone. Their presence and ability to listen is all that is needed.

I will practice with everyday situations that don’t involve a lot of high emotion first. Once I am used to seeking support with everyday things, I will add it to my Personal Coping Kete as a strategy for dealing with distress.

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